Zoe update

Perhaps yesterday's post was a bit premature.

Yesterday Zoe didn't have a good day at all.  I could tell she was uncomfortable and hurting.  I had to give her a sedative twice to help her relax and get comfortable.  To be honest, I wasn't comfortable either.  It's definitely summer here now and temperatures were over 110 degrees.  But I haven't had half my tail chopped off.

Last night I did notice that she had started to bleed through her bandage.  It was good that she still had her bandage on, but not good that she was bleeding.  I had to take her in the vet this morning and the news was even worse than that.

The tip of her short tail has gotten infected because she won't leave it alone and keeps chewing at it no matter how many times I scold her or swat her butt.  Now the tissue is starting to die.  She's going to have to go back on Monday for another surgery to remove even more of her tail.  Hopefully it will be so short now she won't be able to get to it to chew on it.

Until then they changed her meds and how often she takes them.  Since they make her very sleepy and she's taking them more often she's basically going to be sleeping from now until Monday morning.  And that's the way they want her.  They figure if she's sleeping, she's not chewing on her tail.  Unfortunately she's an older dog (about 10 years old) and losses control of her bowls when she's heavily sedated.  I'm going to have a fun weekend ahead of me.

I know that the sedation is necessary  to help her heal, but I feel like a real jerk giving it to her.  But I can't be mad at her.  What happened was a complete accident and one of her own doing.  Even the chewing of the tail doesn't make me mad because that is what anyone would do if something irritated them and they wanted to scratch it.  Even losing control of her bowls and pooping in the house I can't get mad at.  That's what happens to the best of us if we were sedated so much and couldn't control or do things. 

There's no one to get mad at and I really want to get mad at someone and vent my frustrations.  Usually when I feel this way, I like to play games like Gears of War or Call of Duty.  Blowing people's brains out is very therapeutic.  Unfortunately, I'm so emotional exhausted by this whole thing (going on 4 weeks now) that I don't have the mental energy to do anything except veg out and start at the wall.  Hey, that's what my dog does too.  Except she's on drugs and I'm just exhausted.  Oh well.

If you see me online and I seem kind of out of it, now you know why.  Please go easy on me.  Maybe let me win a few more games that I normally would.  Or better yet, let me blow your brains out.  It's okay, you'll respawn.