I've been thinking a lot about where "Pengwenn" all began. It was in August of 2004 actually.
I love to write. But writing can be a lonely endeavor. I had a subscription to Writer's Digest and each year they put out a list of "101 Websites for Writers". This particular year I wanted to find like-minded souls that I could commiserate with when things were bad, and celebrate with when things were good. I checked out several of the sites listed and settled on www.wordtrip.com as the one I wanted to join. The only problem was I didn't have a screen name and I refused to use my own name to sign up. The internet was for anonymity and privacy.
My brother and I sent the day throwing names back and forth trying to find just the right screen name for me. We just couldn't come up with something that fit my personality and that I liked. We took a break for a while and we got back together my brother had the perfect name ready for me: Pen-gwenn. That's how it wanted it shown so people would know my name right away but still see how to say it. I took out the hyphen.
I signed up on the website and the rest is history. Sort of.
When it came time to sign up to Xbox Live and create a gamertag I seriously thought about creating a separate name for gaming then the Pengwenn I had for writing. After all, gaming and writing are two different things. But the more I thought about it. Pengwenn was who I really was. Or who I really wanted to be. It was me. I've been Pengwenn ever since every where I can be online.
When I created a Twitter account I couldn't use just Pengwenn so I used I_Pengwenn (or something like that). I didn't really use that account and years later when I decided that I wanted to be more active on Twitter I had forgotten about that account. I still couldn't use Pengwenn so I created a new one and settled on @PengwennGamer since I would use it mostly for gaming.
I grew up in a VERY conservative house and community. Where "gosh darn it" was a vile swear word and we weren't allowed to say that. We weren't allowed to get angry and yell at people either. That wasn't very nice. But being Pengwenn online I finally find a place where I can be me and break free of those conservative constraints. I challenge anyone to play a game of Call of Duty online and NOT get angry or want to swear at someone.
Pengwenn isn't an alternate persona for me. It's not an act. I'm very much Pengwenn in real life. Except that Pengwenn doesn't have bills to pay, bathrooms to clean, laundry to do, etc. You know, all those things you have to do in real life just to exist. Gwenn has to dress a certain way to go to work. Pengwenn can wear nothing at all if she feels like it (and when it gets up to 110 degrees or more who would want to). Gwenn has to guard her tongue when she gets mad at work. Pengwenn lets it fly . . . even if she's just made at herself. I'm much more comfortable as Pengwenn. No constraints. No restrictions. No limits. And I actually prefer to be called Peng or Pengy instead of Gwenn or Gwenny. Even in real life. It just sounds more like me.
Don't get me wrong. I love my name in real life. It's unique enough without being totally weird and out there. That's also what Pengwenn is too. My brother explained that a penguin is a very unique bird. It has feathers, but doesn't fly. It's more agile and graceful in an area that you would least expect (water). I'm not what anyone expects. I dance and do other girlie things, yet I'm not a girlie girl. I like sports. Not just watching them, but playing them. Yet I'm not a tomboy either. I'm just me. The unexpected, flightless, swimming bird. We tried not to make comparisons to me waddling around when I walk but I think that part is coming true the older I get.
Showing posts with label twitter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label twitter. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 2, 2017
Saturday, December 5, 2015
Double Fine December
So way back in September when I was filming my videos for October I planned on playing Stacking for the month of December. You see, Costume Quest was made by Double Fine and Stacking is also a game made by Double Fine. And there's an achievement in Costume Quest for finding a small nesting doll in a cave and a message pops up about Stacking. In the Extras section of Stacking there's also reference to Costume Quest. I knew these two games were done by the same developer, but I didn't know the other game I had planned for December was done by them as well.
I've wanted to go back and play Psychonauts and finish it for a long time. Since my memory cards were stolen I would have to start over from scratch. But that was okay because it had been a long time since I played that game.
Unfortunately, I was playing scary or Halloween games for October (I thought Psychonauts would fit in well, but I didn't have the time for three games that month). For November I had already planned on playing military themed games in honor of Veteran's Day. So the earliest I could post videos of Psychonauts would be December. It didn't really strike me as a "December/Christmas" type of game but I was going to do it anyway.
Unfortunately I got really sick at the end of November (still am) and my ability to shot videos ahead of schedule was pretty much squashed. When December started I didn't have any videos recorded and I didn't have much of a voice to do so. But the show must go on, right?
I filmed the first episode of Stacking and moved on to Psychonauts. I was filming that episode on Thursday which was the same night the Video Game Awards show was on TV. While I was playing away apparently there was an announcement that Double Fine is going to crowd fund Psychonauts 2. Yeah! Of course I didn't find this out until the next night when I was trying to edit the video and check up on all the news I've missed that week (it's been very busy at work).
Perfect timing right? I didn't have this planned out other than to put up videos of Psychonauts in December because that was the first available month to do so. And it wasn't until I started filming that I noticed Psychonauts was also made by Double Fine. So this month is more timely that I had planned and is a Double Fine month of videos for my Youtube channel. I don't think I could have planned that out any better.
If you want to contribute to the making of Psychonauts 2 (and why wouldn't you) you can check out their fundraising here: Double Fine's Psychonauts 2 funding. If you want to follow Double Fine on twitter they're at @DoubleFine. Check them out. And you can check out my Double Fine videos on my channel here: Pengwenn's Youtube channel
I've wanted to go back and play Psychonauts and finish it for a long time. Since my memory cards were stolen I would have to start over from scratch. But that was okay because it had been a long time since I played that game.
Unfortunately, I was playing scary or Halloween games for October (I thought Psychonauts would fit in well, but I didn't have the time for three games that month). For November I had already planned on playing military themed games in honor of Veteran's Day. So the earliest I could post videos of Psychonauts would be December. It didn't really strike me as a "December/Christmas" type of game but I was going to do it anyway.
Unfortunately I got really sick at the end of November (still am) and my ability to shot videos ahead of schedule was pretty much squashed. When December started I didn't have any videos recorded and I didn't have much of a voice to do so. But the show must go on, right?
I filmed the first episode of Stacking and moved on to Psychonauts. I was filming that episode on Thursday which was the same night the Video Game Awards show was on TV. While I was playing away apparently there was an announcement that Double Fine is going to crowd fund Psychonauts 2. Yeah! Of course I didn't find this out until the next night when I was trying to edit the video and check up on all the news I've missed that week (it's been very busy at work).
Perfect timing right? I didn't have this planned out other than to put up videos of Psychonauts in December because that was the first available month to do so. And it wasn't until I started filming that I noticed Psychonauts was also made by Double Fine. So this month is more timely that I had planned and is a Double Fine month of videos for my Youtube channel. I don't think I could have planned that out any better.
If you want to contribute to the making of Psychonauts 2 (and why wouldn't you) you can check out their fundraising here: Double Fine's Psychonauts 2 funding. If you want to follow Double Fine on twitter they're at @DoubleFine. Check them out. And you can check out my Double Fine videos on my channel here: Pengwenn's Youtube channel
Thursday, October 8, 2015
My start up business 6 month review
When I sat down and finally decided that I was going to do something about starting a YouTube channel, I made the conscious choice to treat it like a business. More than a job, because that's just what you do to pay the bills; this would be treated like a start up business. Now, that doesn't mean I started doing things with making money as my top priority, which is what people generally think of when someone starts a business. Making money off of my YouTube channel has been the farthest thing from my mind. And it's something I'm not even remotely interested in at this time. I was looking at taking this seriously and handling it professionally and in a timely fashion.
I very easily could have said that I was going to start doing YouTube as a hobby. You know, "I'll post a video whenever I feel like it". I didn't want to do that. I also didn't want to make promises that I couldn't keep. I was going to get serious about this, but I was also going to have fun with it.
So, before I even started I sat down and a made a plan. It was a 3 pronged attack. I didn't put this plan together on a whim. I actually thought about it for several weeks before I committed anything to paper. I'm very careful about things. Especially setting goals . . . and starting a business.
Prong #1 of my attack was titled: Physical/Equipment/Hardware.
I sat down and started to make a list of all the physical things I would need in order to start capture videos for YouTube. This part of the plan was the easiest and the one that I was the most familiar with and most ready to execute immediately without too much research and preparation. Before I could even start to capture videos I needed the equipment to do so. I already had the consoles to play games on and capture from, but I needed a capture devise. In my research of capture devises I settled on the Elgato HD 60. The only problem with that was that I also needed to get a new TV (one that had HDMI inputs) and a new computer. These were extra expenses I probably wouldn't have thought of if I had just jumped into this without a plan.
Getting a new TV and laptop can get expensive. And it was. But the benefits for things beyond capturing were worth it. But I had to plan ahead and make sure I had the money to get the items I wanted. But also to get the best that I could afford. Is there better out there? Absolutely. Could I have afforded them? Nope. What I got has been very good, although storage space on my laptop is sometimes lacking. File management is an almost weekly thing. External hard drives are on option, but I'm back to saving up for the things I want. This is a business. I'm trying to be responsible.
Once I had all my equipment in place I could start working on prong #2. Software/Social media.
The hardware is great but it needs software to help it run and work. Same goes with starting a YouTube business. I had to do a lot of research when it came to this part of my plan. Software is so much more selective according to personal taste and function that it gets overwhelming to me at times on picking a specific program to do a specific thing. With the extra expense of a new TV and computer I didn't have the money to get some of the software that I really wanted to get. I still don't have the funds but I'm saving up for them and hopefully I'll get able to get them soon.
One of the things I wanted to get was video editing software. Unfortunately with no funds left for development I had to settle with what I could get for free. That was Movie Maker software that came free with my laptop. If you've been watching my channel since the beginning you'll know that I was having a lot of audio problems while I was recording. I bought, tried and returned several microphones before I finally settled (somewhat unhappily at the time) on using Audacity to record audio knowing I'll just have to spend extra time syncing up the audio and video file before editing. Not the solution I was hoping for, but I had to make it work.
I think I have. But I still have lots to learn. I've tried to spend some time learning Audacity and Movie Maker so I know what I'm doing and hopefully learn to do it better all the time. It hasn't been easy. I did searches for "how to" videos online and most of them haven't shown me anything that I hadn't already figured out for myself on my own. I know there's still a lot I don't understand and/or use that I could, but I'm getting there.
But no all of prong #2 is software related. I have a Twitter account. I've had one since 2009. But I really wasn't using it. No particular reason either. I just didn't think about it when I wanted to say something. That was what this blog was for. I followed a bunch of people (that list grows and shrinks as I find new people and/or drop people I don't like anymore). I just never been one to communicate in 140 characters or less. I'm not an emoji child.
Starting my attack on prong #2 meant I needed to get on Twitter more and use it. This has probably been the hardest part for me. I'm not an extrovert by nature. I'm not a complete introvert either. I can be very extroverted but usually only with my close friends. With strangers it's much scary. And I've have to keep everything within that 140 character limit. If you've read this blog at any time you know I can be a bit wordy at times (this time included). I like being able to explain myself. My thoughts and ideas are brief so why should my communication be as well? I think I'm falling down on the job as far as this is concerned. I'm getting better. But I'm not where I want to be at this time.
The other part of the "social media" aspect is this blog. My blogging hasn't been consistent. Ever. I've set goals to do it X number of times a weeks. But when I force myself to sit at the computer and type something up when I have nothing to say things don't go well for me. But hopefully you've noticed that I have blogged more than I have in the past. There's room for improvement, but I think I'm getting better.
I'll go into prong #3 at a latter post. That's a whole other story that hasn't written itself yet.
So, why am I telling you this? Because it's my 6 month review for my new business. And while it's my start up and I'm doing this for myself right now (more on that later), I still hold myself accountable for the content that I put out. And you're my friends, so I think you should know my thought process on this whole thing. When I tell people what I'm doing on YouTube they just don't get it, unless they're a gamer. And forget about talking about this with my family. Parents just don't understand.
Even though I don't have the views or subscribers right now, I'm not worried about it. I'm just trying to make content that I love and enjoy. Hopefully that will come across in my videos. And hopefully other people will find it and love the same things that I do. Will I get better at it? I hope so. Will more people watch? I hope so too. This has been a whole eye-opening experience for me. In good ways and bad. But don't worry I'm going to blog about that too.
So what do you think about my new start up business? Have you seen any of my YouTube videos? How did you find them (hint: you can find my channel here )? What do you think. You can leave me a comment here, or you can leave me a comment on one of my videos. That would be nice.
I very easily could have said that I was going to start doing YouTube as a hobby. You know, "I'll post a video whenever I feel like it". I didn't want to do that. I also didn't want to make promises that I couldn't keep. I was going to get serious about this, but I was also going to have fun with it.
So, before I even started I sat down and a made a plan. It was a 3 pronged attack. I didn't put this plan together on a whim. I actually thought about it for several weeks before I committed anything to paper. I'm very careful about things. Especially setting goals . . . and starting a business.
Prong #1 of my attack was titled: Physical/Equipment/Hardware.
I sat down and started to make a list of all the physical things I would need in order to start capture videos for YouTube. This part of the plan was the easiest and the one that I was the most familiar with and most ready to execute immediately without too much research and preparation. Before I could even start to capture videos I needed the equipment to do so. I already had the consoles to play games on and capture from, but I needed a capture devise. In my research of capture devises I settled on the Elgato HD 60. The only problem with that was that I also needed to get a new TV (one that had HDMI inputs) and a new computer. These were extra expenses I probably wouldn't have thought of if I had just jumped into this without a plan.
Getting a new TV and laptop can get expensive. And it was. But the benefits for things beyond capturing were worth it. But I had to plan ahead and make sure I had the money to get the items I wanted. But also to get the best that I could afford. Is there better out there? Absolutely. Could I have afforded them? Nope. What I got has been very good, although storage space on my laptop is sometimes lacking. File management is an almost weekly thing. External hard drives are on option, but I'm back to saving up for the things I want. This is a business. I'm trying to be responsible.
Once I had all my equipment in place I could start working on prong #2. Software/Social media.
The hardware is great but it needs software to help it run and work. Same goes with starting a YouTube business. I had to do a lot of research when it came to this part of my plan. Software is so much more selective according to personal taste and function that it gets overwhelming to me at times on picking a specific program to do a specific thing. With the extra expense of a new TV and computer I didn't have the money to get some of the software that I really wanted to get. I still don't have the funds but I'm saving up for them and hopefully I'll get able to get them soon.
One of the things I wanted to get was video editing software. Unfortunately with no funds left for development I had to settle with what I could get for free. That was Movie Maker software that came free with my laptop. If you've been watching my channel since the beginning you'll know that I was having a lot of audio problems while I was recording. I bought, tried and returned several microphones before I finally settled (somewhat unhappily at the time) on using Audacity to record audio knowing I'll just have to spend extra time syncing up the audio and video file before editing. Not the solution I was hoping for, but I had to make it work.
I think I have. But I still have lots to learn. I've tried to spend some time learning Audacity and Movie Maker so I know what I'm doing and hopefully learn to do it better all the time. It hasn't been easy. I did searches for "how to" videos online and most of them haven't shown me anything that I hadn't already figured out for myself on my own. I know there's still a lot I don't understand and/or use that I could, but I'm getting there.
But no all of prong #2 is software related. I have a Twitter account. I've had one since 2009. But I really wasn't using it. No particular reason either. I just didn't think about it when I wanted to say something. That was what this blog was for. I followed a bunch of people (that list grows and shrinks as I find new people and/or drop people I don't like anymore). I just never been one to communicate in 140 characters or less. I'm not an emoji child.
Starting my attack on prong #2 meant I needed to get on Twitter more and use it. This has probably been the hardest part for me. I'm not an extrovert by nature. I'm not a complete introvert either. I can be very extroverted but usually only with my close friends. With strangers it's much scary. And I've have to keep everything within that 140 character limit. If you've read this blog at any time you know I can be a bit wordy at times (this time included). I like being able to explain myself. My thoughts and ideas are brief so why should my communication be as well? I think I'm falling down on the job as far as this is concerned. I'm getting better. But I'm not where I want to be at this time.
The other part of the "social media" aspect is this blog. My blogging hasn't been consistent. Ever. I've set goals to do it X number of times a weeks. But when I force myself to sit at the computer and type something up when I have nothing to say things don't go well for me. But hopefully you've noticed that I have blogged more than I have in the past. There's room for improvement, but I think I'm getting better.
I'll go into prong #3 at a latter post. That's a whole other story that hasn't written itself yet.
So, why am I telling you this? Because it's my 6 month review for my new business. And while it's my start up and I'm doing this for myself right now (more on that later), I still hold myself accountable for the content that I put out. And you're my friends, so I think you should know my thought process on this whole thing. When I tell people what I'm doing on YouTube they just don't get it, unless they're a gamer. And forget about talking about this with my family. Parents just don't understand.
Even though I don't have the views or subscribers right now, I'm not worried about it. I'm just trying to make content that I love and enjoy. Hopefully that will come across in my videos. And hopefully other people will find it and love the same things that I do. Will I get better at it? I hope so. Will more people watch? I hope so too. This has been a whole eye-opening experience for me. In good ways and bad. But don't worry I'm going to blog about that too.
So what do you think about my new start up business? Have you seen any of my YouTube videos? How did you find them (hint: you can find my channel here )? What do you think. You can leave me a comment here, or you can leave me a comment on one of my videos. That would be nice.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
The Butterfly Effect
I think everyone in their life wants to feel like they've made a difference or has changed the world. The youth join causes and start revolutions. The old have children. But to make a difference without having to do either of those things would be pretty special right?
How about changing what games people are playing?
I talk about what I'm playing. The highs and lows. Mostly the lows, I'm sure. Never once did I think that what I said would make someone change what they were playing. Then I got a message from a friend. He's just finished a game and was looking for something else to play. With nothing new on the horizon that piqued his interest he turned to a game I've been talking about a lot recently. Final Fantasy VII.
Like me, he's played this game before. Unlike me, he's actually finished it. Somehow my talking about the game got him excited to revisit the memories of the past. I'm interested in hearing if this play through of the game lives up to his memories of playing it a long time ago. The graphics are very dated, but a good story is still a good story no matter when or how often you play it, right?
I have a twitter account that I keep updated less than how much I keep this blog updated. And that ain't much. When I restarted Final Fantasy VII I made the conscious decision to tweet my experience playing the game for the last time. If I can't make it through this play through (for whatever reason) I don't think I'll try to play it again. I'm using the hash tag #FinalFF7restart. If any of you want to follow along my twitter name is @PengwennGamer. Very original, I know. I can't guarantee that they'll be more tweets than blog posts, but every time I play FF7 I will be tweeting soon thereafter what I did in the game. If you've played it you can follow along and relive your memories of the game without the extensive time commitment. If you haven't played the game you can read some interesting stuff to see what you're missing.
I could say that my evil plan has started and that I'm out to change the world, one gamer at a time, but my dreams and aspirations don't go that far. But I hadn't realized that when this little Pengwenn flapped her flippers that someone halfway around the world would change the game he was playing. It's kind of cool. Maybe this Pengwenn is turning into a butterfly.
How about changing what games people are playing?
I talk about what I'm playing. The highs and lows. Mostly the lows, I'm sure. Never once did I think that what I said would make someone change what they were playing. Then I got a message from a friend. He's just finished a game and was looking for something else to play. With nothing new on the horizon that piqued his interest he turned to a game I've been talking about a lot recently. Final Fantasy VII.
Like me, he's played this game before. Unlike me, he's actually finished it. Somehow my talking about the game got him excited to revisit the memories of the past. I'm interested in hearing if this play through of the game lives up to his memories of playing it a long time ago. The graphics are very dated, but a good story is still a good story no matter when or how often you play it, right?
I have a twitter account that I keep updated less than how much I keep this blog updated. And that ain't much. When I restarted Final Fantasy VII I made the conscious decision to tweet my experience playing the game for the last time. If I can't make it through this play through (for whatever reason) I don't think I'll try to play it again. I'm using the hash tag #FinalFF7restart. If any of you want to follow along my twitter name is @PengwennGamer. Very original, I know. I can't guarantee that they'll be more tweets than blog posts, but every time I play FF7 I will be tweeting soon thereafter what I did in the game. If you've played it you can follow along and relive your memories of the game without the extensive time commitment. If you haven't played the game you can read some interesting stuff to see what you're missing.
I could say that my evil plan has started and that I'm out to change the world, one gamer at a time, but my dreams and aspirations don't go that far. But I hadn't realized that when this little Pengwenn flapped her flippers that someone halfway around the world would change the game he was playing. It's kind of cool. Maybe this Pengwenn is turning into a butterfly.
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