I've lost my way

I've had a really hard time recording games lately.  And it hasn't been fun.  There's one game where I can't get past a boss even though I've filmed 3 sessions attempting to do so. 

There's another game where I exhausted all my lives before even finishing the first level.  After restarting and refilming getting through a couple of levels I exited the game thinking it would save at the end of the level.  Turns out it doesn't.  If you want to save you have to pay gold to do so.  So when I came back to play and film more I found out I didn't have ANY save file.  So I restarted . . . again . . . and filmed the first couple of levels again and got to the point where I could save, but I really couldn't.  It costs 100 gold to save and I had 98 coins and no way to get more.  I wasn't in the mood to play any more, and it was very late, so I just shut the game down and deleted the film.  That was no longer a game I wanted to play.

I tried another game but after 30 minutes of tram and elevator rides with nothing happening I was bored.  And if I'm bored anyone watching would be bored too.  Not good either.

I was so upset after messing around with these games for a couple of weeks I found myself with absolutely no desire to play video games.  At this point I had burned through my backlog of videos and had nothing left to post.  I felt like I had lost my way and I needed something to get me wanting to play again.  I needed something I would love to play and it would put in a good mood. 

I knew the perfect game.

There is one game that I love and always put me in a good mood.  I've wanted to play and finish this game for so long but I've had other games in the works.  The game is Final Fantasy IX.  I love that game.  Whenever I feel stressed out I like to watch Twitch streams of this game and it always make me feel better.  I was less than 10 hours away from finishing this game before my stuff was stolen and I would love to see it through to the end.  Maybe now was the best to restart the game.  So I did.

It did not go well.

At the first moment you get control of the character and start the kidnapping of the Princess (about 5 minutes in) my screen froze.  No big deal.  I'll just restart.  I did.  It froze again and then changed to a screen full of pixilated colors in a funky grid.  Okay, maybe my disk is dirty.  So I took it out and cleaned it off . . . and tried again.  Third times the charm, right?

Nope.

The same thing happened.  My game disk was fucked up and there was no way to get around that.  I talked to my brother to ask him if we knew where his FFIX game was so I could borrow it.  He wasn't sure and I wouldn't be able to borrow it (if he found it) for a couple of days.  Damn.

So now I'm out of videos to post and have no desire to play a video game ever again.  Now you might think I'm over reacting but there's a lot of other life stuff that was contributing to this feeling.  So what was I going to do?

After a good night's sleep I remembered that I started my YouTube channel to help me finish the games I want to play.  It's not about playing games that are current or topical or trendy or whatever.  I post games on my channel to make a commitment that I'm going to see that game through to the end.  Games that I want to play.  Games that I want to finish.  So I've decided to take a break.

I might not be posting regularly for the next while.  How long?  I don't know.  I need to find my gaming mojo again and I don't know how long that will take.  What does that mean for the games I currently have in progress?  I'll still post videos when I can but I'm having issues with those games too.

For Dark Cloud I'm still bummed about my supped up sword breaking.  I've got a replacement and I'm currently grinding to get it back up to an acceptable level.  Once I'm happy with what I have I'll get back to actually playing the story and filming more videos.  As for Summoner, I got really frustrated with getting lost in that game and hated having to keep referring to my strategy guide to find out what I needed to do and where I needed to go.  I know that's what a strategy guide is for but I really prefer discovering things on my own and only using it in an emergency.  I hope the whole game isn't an "emergency" for me.

I might make some "What I'm playing" videos so you can see that I'm actually playing.  I can tell you that I've played a little bit already in Fallout Shelter, Gems of War and Slime Rancher.  I might branch out and play some other games, but for right now those games or all I can muster at the moment.

If you lose the urge to play games what video game gets you back in the mood?  Any suggestions for me?  I might be fumbling around while I've lost my way but I'll find my way back and really start playing games again.  I always do.

Steam Sale noobie

Okay, the Steam Summer Sale has ended and my bank account is heaving a sigh of relief. 

I figured it out the other night and prior to getting my laptop a couple of years ago it's been about 9-10 years prior to that since I've had a computer beefy enough to play games on.  Once I got my lap top I wanted to start getting back in to gaming.  Unfortunately my laptop doesn't have an optical drive so all those computer disks of the games that I own I didn't have a way to install them.  I could have gone out and bought an external CD drive but there have been other things I've had to spend money on.

This year I couldn't wait any longer and I started buying Steam games when I found something that I liked.  I had 7 before the sale started.  Games like The Witcher (the original), 7 Days to Die, Dead by Daylight, More or Die, RWBY: Grimm Eclipse, You Must Build a Boat and just prior to the sale Playerunknown's Battleground.  Now I have a total of 67 games.  I think I went a little overboard.

But the good news is that I really didn't spend all that much money (I love sales).  What's even better news is that I got some of my old games that I have on CD so now I don't have to worry about trying to find a way to install them.  Games like all the Thief games, the Half-Life games (please make Half-Life 3), and a metric butt-ton of Star Wars games among many, many others.  I've even gone back and got original games that started series like Fallout.  I always like to play series from the beginning so I can see how the game progressed through the years.

I don't know when I'm going to find the time to play all these new games (although I've have started playing Portal [love that game]).  And I don't have the hard drive space to install them all on my laptop.  My next goal to complete before my birthday next year is to build a really good gaming PC.  Then I'll probably just plant myself in front of it and play until my brain melts.  I can't think of a better way to spend my time.

Did you pick up anything in the Steam Summer Sale?  I'm curious as what games people got.  I know there were a bunch more that I wanted to get but my budget decided it wasn't a wise move.  And I was only looking in the "under $5" list.  Maybe next time I'll check out the "under $10" list as well.  I better start saving up now.

Days 1 and 2 of Xbox 360 Purgatory

So my Xbox 360 died and I had to send it back. This leaves me in some kind of purgatory. Do I wait until my console comes back? Do I buy (another) back up because it's going to be awhile? You knows.

What I do know is that the first time I had to send my original console in for repair all my friends who had done them same said it took them 1-3 months before they got their system back. I couldn't wait that long. So I bought a back up. Who knew that I would get my original system back a week and half from the date I dropped it off at the UPS store?

It worked out to kaiakapero's advantage when I let him borrow my original, while I played on my backup. Then within in the last couple of months kai's died (again) and I had to make arrangements to send that back. That time also only took a week and half to two weeks for the total turn around time (even though he was out of a system much longer because I didn't send it in right away).

So how much time will it take this time?

Who knows.

This time it's a different error. The dreaded "E 74" error. And probably related to the graphic chip set. This isn't going to be an easy fix. Will they repair my console, which could take awhile, and then ship it back? Or once they receive my console, ship back a different one that they have already repaired? I hope not. In the mean time I'm left to wonder how long it will take before I have an Xbox 360 back to play on.

In the meantime I've decided to pull out my PS2 and catch up on some old games. It hasn't gone well so far.

Day 1:
After watching TV and eating a relaxing dinner I pulled out my PS2 and dusted it off. Then I had to hook it up. Apparently that wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. The TV cable wasn't connected in the back and I didn't feel like moving everything around to get back there to connect it. The multi-cable system I had in the front didn't seem to want to connect all the way in. I couldn't figure out which TV a/v input channel to put the TV on. I had a hard time finding a controller. But finally I got to turn it on and start the gaming. At least that's what I thought.

I realized that I needed a game disk in order to play something on the PS2. I know that sounds funny, but with all the Arcade games I own on the 360 there's tons of games I can start playing immediately without having to bother with a disk. And don't get me started on carrying around a CORDED controller again.

I pulled out my binder with all my PS and PS2 (and original Xbox) games and had to dust that off as well. Then I started flipping through all those pages of games. So many choices . . . so little time. I finally decided on Bust-A-Move '99. Why? because it was towards the front (alphabetically) and it would be a quick, easy transition into the Dual Shock controller. Except that it wasn't quick.

The load times were terrible. I think I sat and waiting for screens to load longer than I actually played the game. If this was what the system was like for a simple bubble popping game what would an RPG or FPS be like? I couldn't remember.

After my frustrated warm up I decided to put in a game that would give me a greater sense of achievement (unfortunately without the beep and a little pop up box). I pulled out Final Fantasy Tactics. I loved that game and I've played it recently on my PSP so the game mechanics were familiar to me even if I hadn't played it on the PS since 2007 (according to the save game file). Even though I didn't spend a whole lot of time getting familiar with my current cast of characters I picked some out and jumped into my first battle. Big mistake!

On the map there was a high wall that separated my team from the enemy. Unfortunately I didn't have anyone with a high enough jump skill to get on top of that wall or anyone with a range to cast a spell past that wall (or more than a couple of squares away). Within three rounds my whole team was dead except for one and he wasn't going to last until his next turn. I killed the power, called it night and went to bed.

Length of gaming session? 30 minutes (at most)

Day 2:
This day I was going to be prepared. I thought long and hard about what I was going to do and I had a plan. I was going to play Half-Life. I've started it several times (like so many of my older games) but hadn't gotten very far. If I just focused on that game and played it every night for a week and a half (based on past experiences) I could be well into the game to continue once my system was back . . . or will have finished the game by then. And if I finished? I could play Half-Life 2 on my Xbox 360. Win-win situation right? Not so fast.

After putting the disk in I got a message that it couldn't read the disk. Oh great. Is my PS2 going to die too? Or maybe there's just too much dust collected inside for it to work properly. I took the disk out, made sure there wasn't anything on it and blow into the disk tray. I put the disk back in and after a very long time for the system to be "reading the disk" it finally loaded up. Yeah!

Then I was left with a decision. I had a saved game file but I didn't know where I was in the story (and I couldn't remember the controlls or story line). Do I start over? Or pick up where I left off? I decided to start over.

I rode the tram through the facility and listed to the announcements and sat through annoyingly frequent load screens. I finally got to a put where I could move around and I started off on my merry way. Got my hazard suit on. Headed down the hall. Tried to access a terminal. And got stuck. Literally.

Apparently I tried to access a terminal at the same time a NPC walked up and stood right in front of it. When I tried to walk away my character couldn't move. When I tired hitting the access button all it would do was talk to the NPC. So I decided to wait until he moved off. Surely I could move then. Unfortunately he couldn't walk away because I was stuck right behind him. Great. I can't move until he moves. But he can't move until I move. I'm having so much fun.

NOT!

I decided to load the save file and see where that put me. Apparently I didn't make it through the training the last time I played.

Power off.

And goodnight to ya all.

Length of gaming session? 30 minutes (at most)

I think this is going to be a long week and a half. And for my own sanity I hope it doesn't take longer than that before I get my Xbox 360 back. If any of you have any suggestions of other, more productive, things to do with my time let me know. Or if you have older games you'd like me to play and review/chronicle my woes in drop a line in the comments. Who knows what I'll play tonight. If I get to play anything at all.

Games I own, but haven't played

Until someone decides to pay me for doing nothing so I can stay home and play video games all day and not have to go to work, I think I'll always own some games that I've never played.

I'm not just talking about sequels I haven't played because I haven't finished playing the original, but other games. Games like Tomb Raider: Legend, Mass Effect and Enchanted Arms for Xbox 360; Doom 3, Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy and Stranger's Wrath for Xbox; Ratchet & Clank: Size Matters and Valkyrie Profile: Lenneth for PSP; Deux Ex: The Conspiracy, Half-Life and Onimusha for PS2; Chrono Trigger, Dragon Warrior VII, Grandia and Medal of Honor: Underground for PS. I have dabbled a little bit in all my Game Cube games but I think that's only because I don't have that many to begin with.

I made the mistake of admitting to some friends that I owned Mass Effect but haven't played it yet and boy did they rip me up and down for that. Okay, I get it and I'm sorry. That game is going to take some time to play instead of 20-30 minutes here and there. Right now that seems to be all the attention span I can handle for any one game. And then there are my friends who keep sending me invites to Call of Duty 4. I suck at the game. My deaths are 2x or 3x my kills, but I still enjoy playing with my friends and finally figuring some of the maps out.

So someday I need to just sit down and pick a game or two and start playing it. You would think the weekends would be perfect for that, but they're not. There's laundry to do, bathrooms to clean and dishes to wash. It's just as much work sometimes at home as it is in the office.

Eventually I will play those games and they can go from "owned, but not played" to "owned, but not finished". That's not much better but it's the best I can do.

Bad Day at Work = Profit for Game Stop

Okay, whenever I have a bad day at work I need something to make up for it. What that usually means is a trip to my local Game Stop. I'm finding the worse my day went the more I spend. And that I've been to Game Stop four times over the last week and a half. Thankfully only this last time was a really bad day.

The last time I was in I wanted one game and one game only. Unfortunately they didn't have it. So I walked out empty handed. And in a worse mood than before. This time I called ahead.

I picked up Bioshock, Blue Dragon and Odin Sphere. All new. If I would have stayed longer I'm sure I would have picked up a bunch more.

Bioshock wasn't a game that caught my attention as something to look for before it came out. I had my sights set on Assassin's Creed and my brother kept talking about Mass Effect. When Bioshock was released it didn't even register on my radar. That is until a bunch of my friends started playing it.

All they talked about was Bioshock. I would try to warn them of a sniper on the top of the building across the LVU campus but they were more interested in talking about their latest encounter with a Big Daddy. Eh? The more I listened the more I got curious about the game. I did some research and found glowing reviews everywhere I looked. How could I have missed a possible Game of the Year winner? At this point I figured I had to have the game . . . the only problem was I could never find it at Game Stop. Sold out. All the time. That's why I called ahead.

Blue Dragon was one that I was interested in getting but would have waited for a used copy and a discounted price before getting. I love RPGs and this game was getting a lot of praise for what it could do for the Xbox 360 in the Japanese market. But since I was in a bad mood I really didn't want to wait to get this game sometime later; I wanted it now! That was the only way I was going to feel better right?

I'd heard some good things about Odin Sphere but have never seen it on the shelves. I'm an optimistic person so I think if a video game store is having a hard time keeping a game on the shelves (like Bioshock) it means there are a lot of people who play it, like it and don't want to give it back. To me that says I should look into the game. That doesn't necessarily mean I'll buy it, but it's one to keep my eye on. Half-Life for the PS2 is prime example of that. I finally got my copy a couple of weeks ago (another bad day) and that's the first I'd ever seen it on shelves since I knew I wanted it (I've had Half-Life 2 for the Xbox for some time now).

I hope any bad days at work and subsequent trips to my local Game Stop all coincide with the release dates of Call of Duty 4, Assassin's Creed, Mass Effect and Halo 3. Otherwise Game Stop is going to have a very nice profit margin . . . and I'm going to have a very empty bank account.

What do you play when you're not in the mood?

I had a very strange day yesterday. I wanted to play video games . . . but I wasn't in the mood for anything.

I tried a racing game (Burnout Revenge). Nothing. I tried some arcade games (Pac Man CE, Texas Hold 'Em, Hearts, Catan) but I wasn't really in the mood for any of them. (Although I did finally come in first place in a $4,000 buy in tournament after being short stacked for awhile. I always finish in the money but I've never come in first.)

I got a couple of invites to play Rainbow 6: Vegas and although I wasn't in the mood I thought it wouldn't hurt. Boy was I wrong. I sucked. The other team was creeping up behind me and taping me on the shoulder before blowing my head off. If I thought I was in a good snipping position I'd find a guy right next to me . . . but on the other team. I died. I died again. And then . . . I died some more. Even when I somehow made it to their spawn point I couldn't kill them when they spawned before they'd get a single shot to blow my brains out.

I've had bad days in games before. It's usually been 'cause I wasn't in the mood to play that particular type of game. Or my eyes were just to tired to focus and concentration on the screen. But a whole night were there was nothing I wanted to play?

I even switched systems. I pulled out the PS2 and loaded a few games trying to find what matched my mood. Metal Gear Solid? Nope. Abe's Exoddus? Not tonight. Half-Life? Not quite right. Gradius? No. God of War. Now that one was a little closer to what I had in mind. Unfortunately by then I was too tired and just shut everything down. A game like that deserves my undivided attention and right then that wasn't going to happen.

I flipped channels on the TV for awhile. Read a book for a while as well. But nothing seemed to satisfy the mood I was in. Hopefully this mood will pass cause I can't imagine what I'd do if I didn't want to play video games.