2 Year Anniversary on YouTube

Today is my 2 year anniversary of posting video on YouTube.  I can’t believe it’s been that long.  Thanks to YouTube I’ve finished a bunch of games with several more about to be finished.  Before I started my channel I don’t know that I would have been able to say I’ve finished ANY games.  I’m not perfect.  Not even close.  But I’m getting better.  (I will never be perfect because there are just too many games out there to play.)

What have I learned:

It take a lot of time to get a video filmed, edited and posted on YT.  Sometimes I wish I could just film and someone else do the editing and posting.  Other times I wish someone else would play the games and I could just edit them.  I’m currently in a “I like to film” phase.  I’m hoping to store up a lot of videos to edit later when I’m in that “I like to edit phase”.

I still don’t have a rhyme or reason to what I post and when I do it.  With the exception of the month of October (scary/spooky/Halloween games) and a military game for Veteran’s Day in November.  It’s hard to pick a game around a holiday but those 2 holidays make it easier.  I’ve tried planning on playing an older game when a new sequel comes out but I can’t time it right so I never know when to start filming or posting them.  Maybe I’ll figure that out later.

If howlongtobeat.com says it takes about 10 hours to complete a game it will probably take me about 18-20.  I thorough and ’m a completionist.  I like to check every nook and cranny in a place before moving on to the next.  And sometimes I have to check 2 or 3 times because I was talking and not paying any attention to what I was doing so I might have missed something.  It’s probably annoying to watch.  I know it’s annoying to me but I can’t help myself.  It’s a small OCD thing that I have that even gets on my nerves (but not as much as if I DIDN’T check everything a couple of times before moving on).

If I have to concentration and focus really hard to get through a difficult section of the game (like a boss fight or tough puzzle) I tend to get really quiet.  I don’t know how other YouTubers can carry on a conversation yet still focus on the problem at hand.  I can’t seem to divide my attention enough to do either one of those things well in those situations.  So I usually just keep my mouth shut and concentrate on the game.  Maybe I’ll get better . . . .

I don’t think I’ll ever get better at video games.  Even though I’m playing more than I use to, I don’t think I’m learning anything to make me better.  My reflexes aren’t getting any better.  My problem solving skills aren’t improving.  Sometimes I even think I might be digressing and going backwards.  I’m still having fun so I’ll keep playing.

Some games are so much easier to edit than others.  The Lego games are easy to edit.  Other games like Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits and Dark Cloud are a little more time consuming to do.  A lot of that has to do with load screens.  Some games have a lot of them.  Some have really long ones.  And some have a lot of them that last a really long time.  Personally when I’m watching videos online, I find it frustrating to sit there for 10 seconds (or more) staring at a blank screen because it’s a load screen.  Edit those dead spaces out!!!  I do.  For some games that’s tough.  For others it’s a dream.

I never thought I would like the editing process.  It seemed the most tedious and boring part of the whole thing.  At first, it really was boring and tedious.  The more I’m doing it the more I find I like it.  Even when I’m not really in the mood to edit.  There’s something about the editing process that makes it more creative than what I feel when I’m playing the game.  If I could find a way to do that for a living I think I probably would.  There’s still A LOT about editing that I don’t understand and know, but I’m willing to learn.

Every game I play (or plan to play) I think of in terms of “will this make a good video/series”.  There has been one game that I filmed 3 videos in and when I went to edit it decided that it wouldn’t be a great game to post.  The game itself is not bad, it just doesn’t lend itself to compelling gameplay that I would want to watch if someone else was playing.  People have made videos in this game, but I can’t watch them for more than a couple of minutes at a time.  On the other hand there are games I really want to play and I know they would make a great series but I don’t have the time to devote to those games now so . . . I don’t play them.  This sucks and I don’t like it, but I don’t want to start a game and play it for a while only to restart it later because now I want to film it.  Tough choices man.

I’ve decided that I will play and post videos of the games that I want to play.  I’ll try really hard not to think that I’ve only got to play and post new games.  Or games that are famous.  Or popular.  It’s not fun to play a game when you feel like you’re being forced to.  It takes all the fun out of it.  If I want people to enjoy my games then I’ve got to enjoy them myself.  Even if I lose.  Or die a lot of times.  That’s why there’s a long time between videos for Psychonauts and Rayman Origins.  I’m not feeling those games right now so I won’t play them until I’m more excited to do so.  This means that I might be playing a bunch of older games that have been around for a decade or more.  I like some of those older games.  But I’ll also try to play things more current because I like those games too.  My channel will just be a smorgasbord of the things I like at any given moment.

For some games I think I want to have a big chunk of the game recorded before I start publishing the videos.  I find it easier to remember what to do, or remember what the controls are if I keep playing it for a while before I get in to a schedule of posting videos.  Not all games are like that.  The Lego games are easy to sit down and record just one level here and there as needed.  Not all games are like that.  I also think that having a large part of the game already recorded before posting gives me a better idea of how long the game will last.  Maybe I can do better at scheduling topical games if I do that.

Doing this is like having a second job.  I’m spending 20-30 hours of week to get 5 or so videos posted.  It’s not leaving a lot of room for any other hobbies or things I’d like to do.  It’s a sacrifice I’m still willing to make even if my family doesn’t understand why I do it.

Right now I still love what I’m doing and I will continue to record videos and post online.  I won’t stop until I no longer find any enjoyment out of playing games and finishing them.  And I don’t see that happening any time soon.  I love seeing my audience grow.  Slowly.  Little by little.  But it’s growing.  I love that.  And when I say I’m open to suggestions of what to play, I mean it.  I really am.  I might not get to it right away, but I’ll put it on the list of what to play next.  So far I have 6 or 7 on the list.  Some suggestions by friends, some for other reasons.  You’ll learn more about those later on.  All in all, it’s been a good couple of years.

Things to work on this next year:  1) learn how to use Photoshop and 2) make better thumbnails.  3) Make intro channel animated slate for videos (might need a LOT of help on this one).

December 2016 and beyond YouTube plans

I figured I should probably share my plans for the month here so you know what to expect on my YouTube channel.  Hopefully you're reading this and will go over there and check out some of my videos.

My plan for December is mostly finish up a couple of games I'm playing or at least get further along in them.  First up is Far Cry Classic.  I started that in November but got stuck part way through and was having a really hard time in the game.  I ended up playing Call of Duty Classic more so that game got finished but I'm still working on Far Cry Classic.  Since I've figured out the swapping guns issue and brightness (or lack thereof) issue I'm sure I can finish up the game this month.

I've also go some videos for dlc missions for Lego Star Wars: The Force Awakens.  I've got those filmed already so I've just got to edit them and get them posted.  I'd also like to make more progress in Lego Harry Potter (yrs. 1-4) even thought I know I won't finish it this month.

I don't know if I can finish this game, but I'd like to get a few more videos from Halo: Combat Evolved up on my channel.  We'll have to see.  Maybe even some more Rayman Origins if I've feeling particular psychotic.

My plan is to finish or get more videos posted for as many Xbox (360 and One) as I can because I have a plan for 2017 which is just around the corner.  It will be here before you know it.  It doesn't help that I've been extremely sick the last couple of days and haven't had the chance to post anything.  I'm feeling better so maybe I can make up for lost time.

My plan for 2017 is to make it "The Year of the PlayStation".  Even though I will continue to play Xbox games, I think I want to focus on playing more PlayStation games.  They may be old.  They may be new.  They may be whatever.  I figure I have a PlayStation Plus or PlayStation Now membership (or whatever it's called) so I might as well use it.  I haven't logged in to my PlayStation account for months so this should be interesting.

Some of the current PlayStation games I'm already in the midst of will continue and hopefully finish sometime next year.  Those games are Psychonauts, Dark Cloud, and Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits.  I've already started recording a couple other PlayStation games and hopefully I'll be able to get those started and finished next year.  I don't want to tell you what those are as I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.

There are a couple of Xbox games that I will be playing as well next year.  I told you I wouldn't stop playing those games.  A friend of mine suggested 3 different games and I've committed to playing them all.  Those will come up periodically throughout the year so keep on eye on what they are.  I've already started playing one of them and I guess if you're nosey you could check my achievements.  Unfortunately I don't think I've picked up any achievements in that game yet.  Almost though.

If you know of any PlayStation games (I, II, or III) that you'd like me to play, let me know in the comments.  I'm open to suggestions and if I don't have the game I just might have to go out and do some bargain hunting for a copy.  I love shopping for video games.

The May Day of all months

May was a particularly hard month for me this year.  I worked from home a lot, which would normally be a welcome treat, but I did it so much I started to feel stir crazy in my own home.  But that's not the really bad thing.

I took my dog Zoe to my parents house for Mother's day.  I brought her in to the house and then put her in the backyard while I went back to my car to get my Mother's Day present for my mom.  When I was coming back in to the house I heard a loud crash and a dog yelp.  Now, my parents have a dog named Coco but every parent knows the sounds their own child makes and I knew that sound came from Zoe.

Apparently she was running across their new tile floors and tried to change direction and slipped and crashed into a very heavy, very solid oak wood dinning room chair.  The chair come down on her tail and hurt her.  Except we didn't know that right away.  When I got in to see her, she didn't seem in pain or hurting.  She was running around the house wagging her tail like nothing happened.  That was until my mom came out of her bedroom and wanted to know if anyone was bleeding.

We course said no . . . but the blood splatters all over the walls told a different story.

I took Zoe outside and hosed her off as best I could because I could see a lot of blood on both her hips.  Once the water ran clear I checked her out and she seemed to be fine.  I left her outside and went back in to help clean up the mess.  There was blood everywhere.  She got blood through 2 hallways and 3 rooms.  Every time she wagged her tail it splashed across whatever surface was near by.  And not just at tail height.  There was blood splatter about shoulder height to humans.

It took about a hour of four people cleaning up the mess.  Then we sat down and had our Mother's Day dinner.  We decided that I should probably take Zoe to a vet to be checked out because that was a lot of blood, even though she didn't appear to be hurt. 

We let her back in and immediately she got blood on things again.  Outside she went.  She was once again covered in blood but we couldn't quite tell where it was coming from.  Her tail, obviously, but she had a lot of blood all over the rest of her.

After a crazy time trying to find an emergency vet open at 6pm on a Sunday night I finally get Zoe in to see someone.  The only place she got hurt was her tail but she had multiple lacerations on her tail.  They wrapped it up, pumped her full of pain medicine and antibiotics and outfitted her with a not so stylish Cone of Shame.  She was loopy and not happy about any of it.

After 4 vet visits over the next 8 days it was finally decided that we wouldn't be able to save her tail and that part of it would have to be amputated.  :(

One of the things I love the most about Zoe is that her tail is always wagging and you always know how happy she is by how fast she's wagging it.  Also, when I'm eating dinner and she knows not to jump up on me or get in my face she will sit very still except for the tip of her tail which twitches back and forth like it's saying "I can't hold all of my energy in so I'm going to let it out just through the tip of my tail".  Now that's gone.

She had surgery on the 18th and lost just more than half her tail.  She was feeling better but now she's pretending that the cone on her head doesn't exist and barrels in to everything like she doesn't care.  It's really annoying.  But I'm not going to complain because she's alive and feeling much better.  It could have been so much worse.

And it's kind of been worse.  Ever since the surgery she keeps ripping off the bandage that they've put on the nub of her tail.  She's not suppose to get to it with the cone on her head but she's figured out a way to use her knee to bend the cone a certain way so that she can just get to the tip of her tail.  She's ripped out 1 stitch and partially ripped out another one.  This has only resulted in more vet visits and vet telling me she's not healing up like she should because she keeps chewing on her tail. 

Because of this, they increased her nerve blocking pain meds which make her very sleepy.  They also gave me a sedative to give her if she starts going after her tail.  Basically I need to keep her in a semi-sedated state until our next appointment on June 7th.  It's been 4 days now and she's been sleeping almost the entire time.  When she is up and awake she walks around like a drunken sailor who would never pass a DUI checkpoint or an old woman who's joints are too sore to bend.  If you try to pet her you'll likely collapse her legs and make her fall down.  She's that out of it.  She's also taken to just stopping and staring blankly at whatever is in front of her.  Could be a wall.  Could be nothing.

As for me . . . well, I've been a nervous wreck ever since it happened.  I've been worried sick about her and it's been very hard for me to play video games or edit the videos I've already recorded because of how bad I feel.  On top of that, now I feel extra guilty because I have to keep her drugged up.  I feel like such a bad mommy. 

I haven't posted as many videos in May as I would have liked.  I actually had to resort to posting videos in a new game (Lego Harry Potter) because those were the easier videos to edit that I had already filmed.  I wasn't actually going to start that series until I finished Psychonauts.  Forget about trying to playing Psychonauts.  That game is really frustrating for me right now and I just don't have the energy to try, fail, die and try again.  Over and over again.  It takes a lot out of you and I don't have that much in the tank right now.

I am starting to find some mental energy to get back in to gaming.  I tired just playing things for fun.  It seems to have worked.  Overwatch helped with that.  We've still got a lot of healing left to do.  Hopefully everything will go well at our next vet appointment.  I can't wait for Zoe to get her cone off.  She's turned it in to a Weapon of Mass Destruction against me and my house.  I've changed my vacation plans in the middle of June because of her.  Whenever I think about how much of a hassle this has all been, I remind myself that things could have been much worse.  Let's hope that eventually things will get better.

Completing games makes me Happy!

One of my goals with my YouTube channel was that I wanted to complete more games that I actually was.  Which wasn't a huge goal that was unobtainable since I wasn't completing any games at all.  If I could just complete one game I would have met this goal.  Fortunately for me I haven't completed just one game.  I've completed 6 games . . . so far.

The first game to complete was also a special one because not only was it a "complete to end credits" completion, but also a "earn all achievements" completion.  It was Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga.  (How fitting that is has "complete" in the game title.)  Now, I've played (and completed) that game on Playstation 2 many years ago but I wanted the achievements and the gamer score.  Unfortunately getting robbed put me back to the beginning and I lost all of my progress.  But I did it.  There were levels and tasks that I thought I would never get done right (damn you Blue Barrels on that last mission) but I stuck with it and I'm proud of myself for not giving up.

I've also been able to start AND complete the following games since I started posting videos:

Dead Space
Costume Quest (including DLC)
Valiant Hearts: The Great War
Medal of Honor
Stacking (including DLC)

That's a total of 6 games that I've started AND completed which is about 6 more than I've done in any other year (for the most part).  At least that part of my YouTube channel has been successful.  And to top it off a couple of those games also had DLC that I completed.  They are also smaller games to begin with but it's still a completion to me.  I've got 2 full size "retail" games in there too.

I'm also getting close (I think) to completing  Psychonauts.  I'm not sure how long the game is but based on my psychic level (about 47) I figure I'm about half way through the game.  Unfortunately sickness and allergies have slowed down the time for recording new episodes.  It's kind of hard to play a video game and talk when you're having trouble breathing or you're sniffling all the time because of allergies.  It sucks.

I think if I started filming the 4 games that I'm suppose to complete based on the post that got this blog started, I would get them done this year.  Unfortunately, I've already started those games and they wouldn't be a full play through.  I think some of them would be okay, but I don't think that would be good for Final Fantasy VII.  Everybody loves that game and who would want to watch a partial play through only?  Not me.  But I don't want to start it all over again just to record footage.  I might, but I'm not there yet.

I wish I had more time to play and edit videos.  I think I'd finish more games if I did.  This day job is really getting in the way.  Oh well.  I just have to do the best I can with what I've got.  Which is only a couple of hours each night during the week.  And if I'm editing, I'm not playing.  And if I'm not playing, I'm not finishing games.  It's such a vicious cycle.  I'll take what I can get now and right now I've finished 6 games that I probably wouldn't have done so without keeping a schedule and posting videos on YouTube.  That makes me happy!

New Year Resolutions

So today's the last day of the year and I'm still questioning whether or not I'll survive the year.  I just can't get rid of this nasty cough.  Oh well.  This cold/mono/whatever has really whipped my ass.  I got sick the week of Thanksgiving and I've been sick ever since, to varying degrees.  It's the cough and extreme tiredness/exhaustion that I'm having the hardest time with.

But the sun keeps coming up and life goes on.  And tomorrow is a new year.

With a new year comes New Year Resolutions.  I make them every year, but I don't always complete them.  Some last almost the whole year.  Some are forgotten or given up on before the end of January.  Either way, I like setting goals.  It's fun and gives me an idea of what I want to accomplish in the next 12 months.

For starters, I have a lot of games.  854 to be exact.  And that doesn't count my PC games, just console games.  I have a really good inventory system.  I kind of have to with all those games.  Of all those games 435 are Xbox, Xbox Arcade or Xbox One games.  Of those 435 I don't have any achievements in 167 of them.  That's 38.39% of games with no gamer score.  So one of my New Year Achievements is to get at least one achievement in all the games I own.  That's a lot of games to play.  I'm pretty sure I won't be able to get an achievement in all of them.  I know, because I've tried in some of those games.  Either way, I'm going to try.

Speaking of gamer score I think I want to get my gamer score at or above 40,000.  I currently have 32,637 and I hope to get a couple more tonight before the new year rings in.  That means I have to get 7,363 in 12 months.  That's an average of 614 points a month.  I think that's very doable.  Especially if I'm going to be playing a lot of games.  I know a lot of people don't care about achievements and gamer score, but I like to see what I've accomplished in the year besides just knowing I spent X amount of time playing video games.  Besides some of those achievements might be hard to get.

I'd also like to complete (i.e. get to the end credits) of 12 games.  That's one a month.  Might be doable, but it will take some effort and planning to achieve.  I'm not sure what those games might be, but I know that a couple of them should be Summoner (PS2), Jedi Outcast (Xbox), Super Mario Sunshine (GameCube) and Final Fantasy VII (PS) since those were the games that started this blog way back on March 2nd, 2007.  That's a long time . . . 8 years exactly . . . and I still haven't finished those games.  I have noticed that since I started my YouTube channel I've finished several games.  That's promising.

The games that I'm the closest to finishing are:
Fable III
Final Fantasy XIII
Gears of War Ultimate Edition
Lost Odyssey
Psychonauts
Rayman Origins
Tomb Raider
Final Fantasy Tactics (PSP)

I think finishing these are doable.  I wonder what other ones I can finish before the end of the year.  Is there any games you'd like me to play and finish?  I'm taking suggestions for my channel and for my New Year Resolutions.  Just name something in the comments and I'll let you know if I've got it.  If not, I might be able to pick it up.  I did get a lot of games through Xbox's sale the last 2 weeks.  Not that I needed more games.  But they were cheap and I video games are so much fun.

Do you have any New Year Resolutions?  If so, let me know in the comments.  Maybe there will be something we can work on together.

Double Fine December

So way back in September when I was filming my videos for October I planned on playing Stacking for the month of December.  You see, Costume Quest was made by Double Fine and Stacking is also a game made by Double Fine.  And there's an achievement in Costume Quest for finding a small nesting doll in a cave and a message pops up about Stacking.  In the Extras section of Stacking there's also reference to Costume Quest.  I knew these two games were done by the same developer, but I didn't know the other game I had planned for December was done by them as well.

I've wanted to go back and play Psychonauts and finish it for a long time.  Since my memory cards were stolen I would have to start over from scratch.  But that was okay because it had been a long time since I played that game. 

Unfortunately, I was playing scary or Halloween games for October (I thought Psychonauts would fit in well, but I didn't have the time for three games that month).  For November I had already planned on playing military themed games in honor of Veteran's Day.  So the earliest I could post videos of Psychonauts would be December.  It didn't really strike me as a "December/Christmas" type of game but I was going to do it anyway.

Unfortunately I got really sick at the end of November (still am) and my ability to shot videos ahead of schedule was pretty much squashed.  When December started I didn't have any videos recorded and I didn't have much of a voice to do so.  But the show must go on, right?

I filmed the  first episode of Stacking and moved on to Psychonauts.  I was filming that episode on Thursday which was the same night the Video Game Awards show was on TV.  While I was playing away apparently there was an announcement that Double Fine is going to crowd fund Psychonauts 2.  Yeah!  Of course I didn't find this out until the next night when I was trying to edit the video and check up on all the news I've missed that week (it's been very busy at work). 

Perfect timing right?  I didn't have this planned out other than to put up videos of Psychonauts in  December because that was the first available month to do so.  And it wasn't until I started filming that I noticed Psychonauts was also made by Double Fine.  So this month is more timely that I had planned and is a Double Fine month of videos for my Youtube channel.  I don't think I could have planned that out any better.

If you want to contribute to the making of Psychonauts 2 (and why wouldn't you) you can check out their fundraising here: Double Fine's Psychonauts 2 funding.  If you want to follow Double Fine on twitter they're at @DoubleFine.  Check them out.  And you can check out my Double Fine videos on my channel here: Pengwenn's Youtube channel