Monday, June 9, 2008

A universal truth in Gears of War

There is some truth in Gears of War. Not the whole Lucust raising up from below the surface and running amok on civilization kind of truth, but something much more annoying in the game. I'm talking about sticking to walls. Stay with me here people.

I was leaving the bathroom (aren't you glad you know that?) when I was just coming around the corner (hugging the wall as closely as I could to save a half a step on the turn) when I ran into someone face to face. We both stood there for five or ten seconds just staring the other person down seeing who was going to alter their path to get around the other. Then it occurred to me. I was stuck on the wall. Just like in Gears of War

Of course I wasn't carrying a chainsaw fitted onto a machine gun (I think that's very important for you to know that) and being hunted by Locust (although a demanding boss comes awfully close if you ask me). But I'm sure if Marcus Fenix (although I prefer to play as Dominic Santiago, he's much cuter) were a real person (and yes I know the difference between real life and video games) the feeling I had would be much like what he would experience when trying to get into and out of cover while fighting across Sera (you know, the name of the planet they're on).

I held my ground (had no real choice in the matter) and she walked around me and on her way. So the next time you complain about the "stickiness" in Gears of War just remember that the programmers might have been basing that off of real world experience (either that or I think about video games too much) so it's a universal truth and one that we, as gamers, are just going to have to accept it. Now doesn't that make it so much more bearable?

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